Church Toolbox - Tools to Build and Grow Your Church

7:40 10 Individual work, in 4-5 sentences each, write the Good News you would like to share with a friend about:

iii) Why do you think St. Paul is so passionate about wanting to share the Gospel?

iv) What insights does this passage offer to people who want to be able to share their faith with others?

“Jesus, I have come to realize that you already know me and love me. Now I want to know and love you too. I want to become one of your followers, and learn to live the new life of God’s Kingdom. Please forgive me for everything in my life that has come between us, and help me to renounce it so that I can follow you faithfully and consistently from today on. Help me grow deeply into you, and love you more and more. Amen”

There are two sides of the Gospel story. We have shared and talked about both sides during the last two weeks.

Effective witnesses must know the Biblical story and their own story. Mostly the Biblical story is of God’s unstoppable love. Our story tells of our own faith development and experience of God’s grace.

There are always significant events, people, circumstances, decisions, etc. which demonstrate how God’s story intertwines with our story and through which we experienced (and continue to experience) Christian development. There is great power where these two stories meet. We have something to share! People want to hear!

1. The Good News about Jesus (God’s story) you have experienced (your story) which you want to share with a friend. (3 R’s)

2. The Good News about your Church (where God and His people come together) which you would like to share with a friend. (healing, forgiveness, acceptance)

Note: A small note pad is useful - one sheet for each question, or a larger pad divided in two parts, the upper portion for Question 1 and the lower for Question 2.

Many people have a certain apprehension and reluctance about initiating evangelizing conversations. Accept your reservations and proceed to be a faithful witness!

It may be helpful to recall that we have had many previous conversations with this friend before, some of which have been pretty deep. We also recall we have been praying for guidance, discernment, and courage to have this particular conversation. We have been praying for this particular friend. We have been asking God to prepare their hearts and provide the proper opportunity. We have offered God our mouths if He will bring the words through them. The greatest act of friendship in which we can participate is sharing the deepest, most important truths we know with someone about whom we care. This is not a cold call on a stranger about a stranger.

We want this conversation to be as natural as possible. There is nothing contrived about our relationship with Jesus or this friend. Jesus seeks us out because He genuinely wants to be our friend, and we do the same for others. We enrich each other. Nevertheless, it is helpful to have a broad outline of our proposed conversation to help keep us focused and increase our level of confidence. All important conversations are preceded by thought and planning, certainly my marriage proposal was!

There are five essential elements of a well focused evangelistic conversation. Not all of these elements may occur in every evangelizing conversation. Some may be postponed for future conversations. Keeping these elements in mind will help with focus and confidence.

1. Bridging is the act of moving from some other conversation or activity to the evangelizing conversation. Most of us should just stop intentionally avoiding the natural opportunities that regularly come our way! We often pass up clear, unintentional opportunities to start evangelistic conversations. If our faith is important to us, chances are our friend already knows it. It is perfectly natural for people to talk about what is important to them. Perhaps your faith is why the other person allowed the friendship to develop. Friendships are two-way relationships.

Often news events, or comments the friend might make about some other person’s faith (e.g. a sports figure) may provide an opening or a follow up comment about your own faith. Then you can wait for a response. A wonderful conversation might follow immediately.

Sometimes a friend might ask a question, e.g. “How are you managing with so little time off?” which you can turn into an opportunity to share the sustaining power of Christ, or prayer, or your Church family support, etc. Ask a friend what they did or what kind of weekend they had, and when they inquire about yours, you can share about the great fellowship (meal, miracle, music, other special program, motorcycle rally, etc.) at Church.

Building bridges is probably more an art than a science. If Christ is in the forefront of your mind and heart, it will be difficult not to talk about what is on your mind! The goal is to get to the point where we can build bridges naturally, sensitively, and unobtrusively.

2. Diagnosis or listening is an essential part of evangelism. It shows we are taking the other person seriously, i.e. we are truly interested. When we listen to the stories of others, we can almost always have an opportunity to share our story (which of course is intertwined with God’s story).

Listening is how we discover what others know about the claims of Christ. An unchurched person or one with Jewish background may take a different starting point than a backslider. We need to diagnose the friend’s openness to conversation about Jesus. Some may be sitting on ready, some may be very hostile and we may need to have many conversations about other things before much spiritual truth can be discussed. Hurts need to be probed lovingly so God’s healing can be brought to bear on them. Even agnostics may let you pray to your God about some problem in their life.

3. Permission to share your faith with another person can open the door to fruitful conversations, and the lack of asking, is one of the reasons evangelism frequently suffers from a bad reputation. If a person is clearly not open to receiving any words of faith from you, proceeding to share them without knowing the state of openness, is unlikely to bear anything but lessened future opportunities. Asking sets a more gracious climate, disarms possible resentment, and lends dignity to the conversation. Forcing a witness on someone before they can object is not helpful.

Usually only a sentence or two is required to ask permission. Where a person has had a bad experience, you might say something like, “I felt just like that too. We only changed our mind after we tried going to St. Francis. I’d love to tell you about what happened if you are interested.” Or perhaps responding to a different issue, “I’m no theologian, but my faith is very important to me. May I share with you what I understand Jesus (the Bible, the Church, my pastor) says about the issue?”

Asking permission is better than asking forgiveness. Jesus doesn’t come by forced entry. He knocks on the doors of our hearts. He is the perfect gentleman. We don’t get second chances to make first impressions.

4. Making Your Case is what you do with the opportunity you get to present your case or make your point about what Jesus has done in your life. It will more likely take six months than six minutes to get the opportunity to make your case for following Christ. Remember that the Christian life is a marathon not a sprint. Conversion usually takes lots of time. Pray, stay alert, and see what happens. This stage may take several sessions over an extended period. We are trying to start a process which, we pray, will influence the person to follow Christ.

At some point it will seem appropriate to invite the person to Church. It may come sooner or later. Lots of time is usually spent in listening and answering questions. This is the element in which the story is shared, i.e. the place Jesus (Church, faith, etc.) holds in our lives (witness).

After you have spent much time in prayer, made the friend through bridging, diagnosed the situation, and asked permission, you should be in position to know what aspect of the Good News might be most profound and appropriate for the friend to hear. You must know God’s story to be able to do that. For some it may be God’s forgiveness, others His promise of eternal life, or it may justice, or mercy, or the meaning of life, or structure, etc.

5. Closure done properly, will assure that as each conversation episode concludes, the groundwork for future conversations at appropriate times is laid. The goal is to bring closure to the current conversation while keeping the door open to future conversations. An example might be, “Thanks for being so open with me ...... Let’s get together for a bagel ... next week and talk some more about ....?”

At some point in the relationship and conversations, the friend is likely to show readiness and openness to turn to Christ. This is what you have been praying and waiting for! Now what are we to do?

Evangelism can be described as the ministry of introductions. When someone understands that Jesus is inviting them to follow Him and the person has come to the point of sincerely wishing to do so, the simple word yes is a perfectly adequate response. It does not even have to be spoken aloud. A nod of the head or a raised hand will certainly do! A one word prayer or motion, particularly when someone is overcome with emotion is quite in order.

Some will want to know in advance precisely what they will pray and the nature of the commitment to accept Jesus as Savior and make Him their Lord. The Baptismal vows, BCP 302-5, provide a comprehensive prayer. A simpler, less imposing commitment prayer is: (Hand out)

“Jesus, I have come to realize that you already know me and love me (God’s initiative and pursuit). Now I want to know and love you too. I want to become one of your followers, and learn to live the new life of God’s Kingdom. Please forgive me for everything in my life that has come between us, and help me to renounce it (exorcism) so that I can follow you faithfully and consistently from today on. Help me grow deeply into you, and love you more and more (commitment and in-filling). Amen”

Some may not feel comfortable with a prayer of total commitment to God forever. That is OK. I believe that once a person gets a taste of Jesus, becomes aware of just how real He is, and senses His real presence in their life and activities, it won’t be long before a deeper commitment is made. Both in my marriage and with God, I was too broken to be able to make more than superficial commitments. Shirleen did not know it, but God did. Both honored me by accepting me as I was. Over time my commitments to both God and my wife grew and deepened marvelously.

It is OK for you to have a prayer written out, or write one out on the spot for the friend to take home and pray later. Ask them to call you when they have prayed it. You will want to rejoice with them.

Don’t make it too complex. We are not trying to help them understand every jot and tittle of the faith. There is plenty of time ahead for learning and growth. Let’s help people get started first! Good Luck!

[1] Harold Percy, Good News People, Anglican Book Centre, Toronto, Canada, 1996, unless otherwise noted.

[2] Harold Percy, Good News People, Anglican Book Centre, Toronto, Canada, 1996, unless otherwise noted.